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[19 Jan 2007|10:03am] |
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mood |
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music |
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snl. |
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so hm,
haven't updated the LJ lately,
but ch'yeah.
ilove D4L+
they're my clique basically.
loveyoubitches<3.
and i love my boys. :)
me and samer still aren't together.
he's talking to other chicks, i say whatev. fuck him.
i've been really fiesty lately.
but everything amuses me.
we're not going to cancun anymore :/ that really upsets me.
but PCB once again for spring break.
we got the condo and it's alot cheaper but that means i gotta get 2fakes. greatttttttttttttt.
but ch'yeah, hopefully it'll be fun. samer's going.
dear god, i'ma die. lol
but i've been working not as much as i used to. paychecks are getting smaller.
only about 300$ now.
damn. i need more work.
but i work tonight.
and hopefully i get to see my boys<3.
goodbyeeee.
♥
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[18 Jul 2006|02:28pm] |
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mood |
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music |
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Live like you were dying-tim mcgraw |
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I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house
That don’t bother me
I can take a few tears now and then and just let’em out
I’m not afraid to cry every once in a while
Even though goin’ on with you gone
still upsets me
There are days every now and again
I pretend I’m ok
But that’s not what gets me.
i hate this.
i hate love.
i hate caring when he doesn't.
i literally cannot take it.
the only times i feel content is when i drink, and that doesn't always help.
things have changed so much.
i don'thave real bestfriends anymore.
it's like i don't even remember what it was like when i had a real bestfriend.
i'm so down lately.
but i can't cry.
:( :/
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[03 Apr 2006|09:36pm] |
WATERPARK WITH AMBER FOR SPRINGBREAK!!! :) :)
i miss that chicaaa!!
&&her family!
woooooo.
payday tomorrow toooo.
i better save my money,
which means, i gotta stop from spending it all on alcohol or shopping or food. lol
i party like crazy and i love it,
and i have the bestfriends in the whole world :)
♥
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[24 Mar 2006|01:35pm] |
if you didn't do this on my deadjournal..
then here it is for livejournallll :)
1. Reply with your name&I will write something I like about you.
2. I will then tell you what song/icon/movie reminds me of you.
3. If I were to apply an o'clock to you, I'll tell you what it would be.
4. I will try to name a single word that best describes you.
5. I'll tell you the most memorable moment I've had with you.
6. I will tell you what animal reminds me of you.
7. I'll then tell you something that I've always wondered about you.
♥
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[20 Mar 2006|10:23pm] |
uhm, how long has it been since i wrote in this?!
well loads is diff.
samer had sex with brittney in december.
and nothing has been the same since summer.
i love him, and he lost his love in me.
so as of right now we're done.
and he doesn't care.
and i'm trying to pretend i'm fine with it,
but deep down, i'm like dyinggggg.
i need him and he doesn't need me,
he's perfectly fine without me, i don't understand.
but somethings just have to end.
but yeah,
goodbye.
felt like a needed update?
♥
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[28 Aug 2005|10:20pm] |
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mood |
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sad |
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i'm not happy anymore.
♥
:/ :(
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[27 Aug 2005|02:15pm] |
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mood |
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 tired |
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So basically.. school is funnnn :) i love all my classes and the people in my classes.
i love talking&seeing people i haven't seen ina long ass time.
i love my friends with everything i have.
me&samer are shit right now, but it's ok.. i'm not really stressing about that kid anymore really.
i just need some friend time cus he's diff. and weird&i don't like who he is now.
butttt.. work is okay. i can't wait until pay day i know i worked alotta hours so hopefully i get loads of money cus i need money sooooooooo bad. and iuno when payday is though :/ :/ gahhh.
gas is killlinnnggg me, and my car sucks sooo bad. i just needa new car. :( but yeahhhh...
nick's was alotta fun last night. :)
but i'ma go :) goodbye.
♥
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[08 Aug 2005|02:05am] |
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mood |
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lonely |
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so me&samer are dunzo.
it sucks.
iuno...maybe this is another regret?
who knows anymore.
but FUCK LOVE.
"if love be rough with you, be rough with love..."
-Romeo+Juliet♥
..so basically, shit's aboutta change with me.
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| every step that i take, is another mistake to you... |
[02 Aug 2005|10:05am] |
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mood |
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 sick |
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well, i have strep throat&it hurts :( :(
my parents are out payced for a few days in florida.
uhm, iuno.. me&samer have been hanging out everyday so far.
lauren&stacy kinda hoed on me yesterday, kept saying they'd come over and like 2-3 hours later they still weren't over so whatev with that one.
but, warped tour was 2 days ago.. it wasn't as fun as last year, but it was okay. atreyu was amazing. ♥ ♥ ♥
Registration for school is the 19th and school starts the 25th. yeah, i'm soooo not even ready. i hate it. to think anothherrrr long time of school. it just sucks cus summer went by too fast.
but, i'm out.
♥
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| long time.. |
[24 Jul 2005|01:12pm] |
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mood |
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 grumpy |
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so haven't updated in a LONG TIME.
so to update you guys....
got my license, got ina accident already. got the blazer taken away. so now i will be driving the nova once again. i had a job interview at penn station restaurant hopefully, i get the job. uhm, i have been hanging out with abbass and his friends whom i loovvveee very much so ♥ and i've been having loads of fun. but samer comes back friday, iuno if i'm happy or kinda bummed :/ but iuno.... i gotta go clean my room. goodbye
♥
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[01 Jul 2005|01:51am] |
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mood |
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 chipper |
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so i will be in florida for about 2 weeks.
♥
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[24 Jun 2005|05:13pm] |
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mood |
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bored |
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First of all.......
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVEEEEEEEE the new layoutttt ♥ :) :) :)
but this entry will be a VENT entry!
so let's think....samer's off at his country. i miss him, i really do. but it's just weird like i'm not even thinking about him really. i feel blank. like i'm not missing anything or whatev. and iuno.. i just feel weird. like i don't feel like i know him, and it's not the same even though he just left about 4 days ago. ooh well, these days have went by soooooooo slow. it's like a snail. but good news!!! i leave for florida next friday so i'm fucking EXCITED!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :) :) :) well anyways, i'm really disgusted with myself. i really wanted to get fit this summer and fix myself up but alls i'm doing is getting fatter and nastier. i'm not proud of myself. i feel like i really let myself down. and samer's sexy and skinny and everyone wants him but yet what am i? fat, ugly, big boobs only? nobody wants me. well whatever, it's all just getting to me. and who knows. i feel as though me & samer aren't going to make it, it really upsets me. i really wish we'd laugh cus i can see me with this kid for the rest of my life, but shit will most likely happen and we'll split. anyways, most highschool relationships NEVERRRRRRRRRRRR work. and iuno, i feel like i have no bestfriends right now. i mean they all seem to have their other friends. and like lauren&stacy are butt buddies. but yet i feel like i'm the 3rd wheel bestfriend and like they don't even wanna hang out with me. then i love abbasshoe to death, that kid is like my good friend, but stac&him hate eachother so it's difficult. and i just wanna car so i can go visit alot more people. like i know i'ma visit arafat alot when i get my license cus he's my bestfriend and i love him very much, but i never get to see him :/ iuno... i just miss old times. but i need to stop complaining. i'ma mess.
♥ :/
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| la la la la la.. |
[25 May 2005|02:48pm] |
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mood |
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exhausted |
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music |
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okay |
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well yeah, this actually isn't going to be a venting entry :O :O holy shit right?!
well just to update...
UPNORTH LAST WEEKEND WITH FLAPPIES WAS AWESOME<3. I'VE NEVER HAD THAT MUCH FUN IN FORRREVVVVERRR!
but it was just a blassttt :)
so iuno.. me&samer have been on & off like woah. it's so retarded.
but yeah, seniors leave tomorrow.. i'm happy for most of them leaving.
thank god.
but my dad got like 30 pounds of steak, more now so i'm excited. haha
♥
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| the thirtieth of april seems like yesterday.. |
[08 May 2005|08:06pm] |
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mood |
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 contemplative |
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music |
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sunday morning-maroon 5 |
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okay so i deffinetly am in need of venting since it's been how long since i have vented?!?! well.. prepare me to use this journal more and to read my rants&raves about dumb shit.
so you see, me&samer are almost 6 months.. it's been amazing for the most part. we've had our good and bad times yes. but like we have our fights and we've had these close to break ups and take "breaks" it's just dumb i don't know but like lately it's been all me. it's me being jealous. i hate being a jealous person, i reallllllllllllllyyyyyyyyyy do. but it's just like girls these days, YOU CANNOT TRUST THEM. okay, so myspace fucking pisses me off. dumb slutty girls on there that want my bf's nuts majorely. i really dislike it. and it really does upset me. so i tell samer and he seems to care at that moment but then he tells me how dumb i am and that it's not a big deal, blah blah blah. but you see.. it's just how he is with other girls that scare me. cus he's so friendly&flirty. it i uno..i get uncomfortable. but anyway, he tells alotta people "iloveyou", "imissyou", "we're hanging out", "cutie, sexy, beautiful, gorgeous" ...etc. it just i uno erks me. i dislike it very much so. but anywho, it's just like got me thinking alot lately. so i guess you could say i've been really down lately and beginning to be depressed ever so much just like i was last year after me&ry. i really do not like this. I LOVE BEING HAPPY. i love to be the fun me. but lately, i can't it's like i'm too attached to samer and i'm making him too much of my life. i'm seriously being rediculous. i want to get some medicine or something.
but you know what's weird....
okay, so i found out in youth assistance, when people have sex, girls release this type of gland or something that guys don't have..it's attachment. this is why girls get more attached after sex than guys do. i feel this is partially it. like i'm soooo attached to samer. i need to get away or something and help myself out. give some space. i think this summer, as much as i feel i'm gonna hate it, i think it's for the best that samer's gonna be gone like 38 days. we need that time away from eachother. we need to see if our love is strong enough or if we really are just desperate with eachother and if we can stay true or if we are just some dumb boring high school "teenage love" couple. i really want to test the relationship. i have alot of questions i wish i could answer. it's so different for me. like the slighest things get me mad lately. and i try SOOOO hard not to let things get to me or to at least pretend like nothing's wrong but shit, i'm just a bitch and a horrible person i guess. cus i feel like i have to be with samer 24/7 or i'm not happy and i get pissed. and it's so dumb of me to be like how i am, but it's just like something that happens. i really cannot help it, i know people say you can help it.. but honest to god, i can't.
i really need help.
but, i need to go redo this layout...
♥
tomorrow's our 6 months.
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| i used to get the worst looks... |
[27 Apr 2005|09:15pm] |
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mood |
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 confused |
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music |
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i'm watching meet the barkers. |
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THIS IS ME UPDATING!!! FIRST TIME IN FOREVERRRRRRR!!!
so me&samer almost 6 months :) i'm excited.
i love him very much.
hm, nothing exciting has been going on.
finished drivers ed seg. 2 yesterday.
youth assistance is fun. :)
i ♥ court, erin&cheddie.
..but yeah, just felt the need to update.
nobody's probly gonna read this.
♥
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| every breath we take.. |
[14 Sep 2004|03:20pm] |
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music |
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paper cuts with appologizes-ftw |
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Comment to be added :)
♥
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| our life lies standing broken.. |
[31 Aug 2004|08:19pm] |
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mood |
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 crazy |
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music |
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loose lips sink ships-a change of pace |
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first day back to school was amazing :)
me & graham talk alot now :) yay.
suchan is in my bio. i <3 him. he's sucha sweety..
my lunch rocks!! it has tondreau, kovacs, penina, suchan, perry, bart, adam, chris & whoever else but those are my fave people in there :) i ♥ it.
but yes, me & jonathon don't have lunch or any classes together :( doesn't make me very happy!!
plus, i don't even get to see the awesome jimmy doyle :( it upsets me also..
but, Let's see.. cory's in my 5th hour, how awesome that is, NOT!! i honestly don't see me getting along with this kid. blah.
but Mhm, i give stac & rach a ride to school.. & rach, stac & laur a ride home..
family vaca to mammoth cave this weekend. i want stac to go with me.. but hm, i'm out.
♥ Comment bitches.
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